Ahh, it feels so wonderful to be back on the blog!! This past week Erin and Daynna opened up about their successful mindset breakthroughs and journeys, and it’s truly been so inspiring and uplifting that I’ve hardly thought of anything else since. (Watch their videos and see what all the buzz is about over on our Facebook page when you get the chance!)
With that said, I have to admit that sometimes I don’t even know where or how to begin my own storytelling process because I’m having difficulty forming my thoughts into written sentences—or even stringing them into one cohesive thought to rally around a focus. A piece of writing with a message. That’s when I recognize just how important it is to write it all out in order to come to an inner understanding. It’s always been my ground point of personal reflection; my kick starter to a regroup sesh with myself.
So please excuse me if today’s post is a little off the beaten path of what I typically discuss on Sweet Success Society. I honestly haven’t opened up like this with you before, but I feel like it should be shared because as I sat with my fingers hovering over the keyboard for days, it finally dawned on me that this feeling is part of life and definitely not uncommon. On the contrary, I bet it’s more common than any of us would like to admit… but we don’t want to talk about it, or—even worse—admit it to our audience.
Actually, let me rephrase that. We don’t like to admit it to our audience until we have a fully executed solution. Which I don’t have today—today, it seems all I have are comforting words that you aren’t alone. I’m not alone. Not much of a “how-to” post… more of an open dialogue with you lovelies. But hey, it’s what’s been on my mind.
Have you ever said to yourself, “Damn, it’s time to push the reset button”? Where you feel it’s past due to get back on track with healthy eating, exercise, work productivity, connecting with loved ones—you know, for anything (and everything) in life. You know you’re capable of it, but realize you need to give yourself that mental push into actual commitment and, subsequently, take fucking action (to put it bluntly).
Well, that’s exactly how I was feeling. I was so pumped up to “press the reset button” and take dramatic action toward bettering my lifestyle and shaping it to be what I want and expect of it. So I started my favorite 30-Day Cleanse, rededicated to my own 4-Week Habits for Success Challenge, and had so much momentum to reorganize and align my life with my expectations for it.
Several weeks later, I looked back on this “reset” and my first thought was that I failed myself. I wasn’t consistently spending all the countless hours I intended in my new home office (that may be a floating desk under the stairs). I had a few cleanse cheat days from our travels in Sonoma and San Francisco, then a few more when my parents came to visit, and then a few more because, well, why not at this rate? I wasn’t exercising like I intended and even got out of the rhythm of yoga every evening before bed.
I beat myself up over not feeling like a rock star day in and day out. Which only made it worse because I’d see my confidence shrink as I retreated into the shadows. The days slipped into several weeks of hiding from my abandoned intentions and I questioned my ability to be more than just… mediocre and going through the motions. Seriously guys, I felt ashamed that I wasn’t living by my own standards.
And yes, apparently I am that dramatic.
So maybe every day didn’t wrap up with me feeling like my own version of a rock star. It’s not like I was doing nothing—one of my prominent achievements was becoming more social again, which was an element drastically missing from my life until recently. Three months ago, I genuinely sobbed to my (rather confused) boyfriend about how lonely I felt without a solid group of girl friends. He lovingly told me to, essentially, do something about it—and, well, I did.
But despite that, I kept focusing on what was lacking and the promises I made myself that were so sincere before gradually hollowing out. The phrase, “Life’s a rollercoaster” is absurdly true—and that absolutely goes for our mindsets in addition to life’s circumstances. We have our brilliant, on-point times (our rock star phases), and then other times in which we’re a little more all over the place, or we place our accidentally focus on other aspects of life that aren’t aligned with our individual expectations of daily productivity and success.
Which brings me back to this magical reset button. When we’re not rock stars every day all day, we tell ourselves we need to make a change and immediately jump to the explanation that it’s time for a reset. I’ve used the term pretty loosely for so long, and as I began to tell myself (again) that I need to just press it harder this time around, a big red flag went up.
Come on, Lexi, you know better than that.
As I reflected on what I have and have not accomplished recently, I came to the realization that it’s not necessarily about “setting a reset button.” Improving ourselves does not happen overnight, as I knew before, so the hell was I using the word as if it was?
Instead of the concept of a “reset,” perhaps it’s more of a “regroup.” Instead of stewing in our thoughts until we can’t take it anymore and mentally slam the button for a quick fix solution… it’s that recognition of expanding our minds and breaking the circular pattern our thoughts are wrapped in.
Like what I consider my most destructive pattern. I’d open my computer and—literally—stare at it. The seconds became minutes, and without really knowing what to tackle first, I’d get lost in the familiar “feed scroll.” And that’s pretty much how it went for a few weeks.
Like for Sweet Success Society, the transformation we’ve experienced as a team, as a business, and as a brand has really been inspiring. And to be honest, I’ve been a bit on the sidelines the past few weeks. When I’d open my computer and try to map out alllll the things that need to get done (because, hello, this is a fully functioning business and of course there’s always a million things to do, I’m preachin’ to the choir!), I was getting lost in all the wrong things.
I needed to change my patterns, beginning with my mindset and how I approached the very things that I define as daily successful living. That’s not a reset of the mind, it’s a regroup.
As a whole, regrouping is figuring out how to go back to the basics. We get so stuck in the weeds of the overwhelming amount of tasks (big and small) that require our attention, simultaneously with the frantic feeling of “OH MY GOD THIS NEEDS TO GET DONE RIGHT NOW.”
This past weekend, instead of diving into all the little details that I shoulda woulda coulda been working on over the past few weeks (in other words: catching up), I decided to focus on my mindset. That’s where the real struggle comes in, and pretending it is actually about the tasks at hand is, to put it simply, a sneaky form of procrastination. I needed to nurture my mind. Take some time to regroup my thoughts, my actions, and my behaviors to transform them into a cohesive mindset that produces results. I had to kick my butt into productivity mode, and the first step was getting my mind organized, excited, and proactive before jumping head first into the sea of endless tasks.
So I’m breaking the pattern of the past few weeks with a few simple mix-ups. For instance, I listen to audiobooks on repeat out of comfort and decided that instead of re-listening Game of Thrones around the clock, to sneak in some TedTalks. So what’d I do? Download the app (umm, which is amazing and I highly recommend!) and add 86 TedTalks to my queue, and it didn’t require a grocery trip.
I’ve also felt so uninspired to stick with my usual healthy eating habits. As an effort to regroup with the healthy living, I took stock of our fridge and pantry and made a list of what was available to eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner from what we have. I haven’t wondered what to eat for the next meal since.
Recognizing and acknowledging our setbacks is one thing, but actively making a difference to progress is quite another. Take a deep breath and remember everything is not going to change overnight, but it starts with that small act of setting yourself up for success. Get back on track by organizing your resources to give yourself that breathing room and ability to journey on up to the top of that rollercoaster again. Regrouping begins with the mindset gaining its confidence.
Hell, I’d even consider this blog post to be its own form of regrouping. I needed to go back the basics by simply getting back to writing and out of my head. That’s what helps me best and I know that about myself.
Thank you for reading, loves! ❤️